Following Insurrection, 75% of West Virginia on No-Fly List

National Guard Explains They Were Late to Capitol Due to Single Tracking

The Beach Boys Plan Summer 2021 Reunion Tour As Elderly Get Vaccinated First

"I Remember My First U.S.-Backed Coup,” Nostalgically Sighs: Afghanistan, Angola, Bolivia, Brazil, Burkina Faso, Chad, Chile, Cuba…

Cambodia, Egypt, El Salvador, Ethiopia, Dominican Republic, Grenada, Guatemala, Haiti, Hawaii, Honduras, Indonesia, Iran, Iraq, Laos,Libya, Nicaragua, Panama, Poland, Uruguay, Republic of Congo, Syria, Venezuela, Vietnam, Yemen.

"We Are Better Than This" and Other American Fairy Tales

• The Fantasy Land of All Are Welcome Here

• The Spell of Work Hard and Your Dreams Will Come True

• Ye Ole Trickle Down Economics

• Pull Yourself up by Your Magic Bootstraps

• The Legend of “The Things Were Better Back in the Day”

• This Enchanted Generation is Better Off Than The One Before

"Just Hang in There Until Spring!" Whispers Columbia Heights Woman to Herself as the Sun Inconsiderately Continues to set at 4:30PM During a Freaking Coup!

Thousands of Hipsters Reconsidering Their Duck Dynasty Beards 

"How'd They Find Me?" Asks Your Police Academy MAGA Cousin After Updating his Facebook Status to: "Just Mobbin'"  

As Nation Tears Self Apart, Jedi Master Jimmy Carter Reports Feeling "A Disturbance In the Force"   

With Trump Off Twitter, Capital Letters Can Relax, Go Back To Enjoying Weekends