Brightwood Couple Agree to Share Air Fryer Custody Following Breakup

WASHINGTON, DC – Recently separated couple Brandt Gellner and Lindsay Ellsworth announced via Instagram today that they have come to an agreement regarding joint custody of their air fryer.  

In simultaneous screenshots from their iPhone Notes app they posted the following statement:

“We will always have love for one another, even if we do not see a future where we are entwined together as ‘Bransay’ as many of our close friends called us. But we find a way to rise above the daily stress and that’s why we have come to an amicable agreement about joint custody of our beloved Clikon Digital AirChef brand air fryer.”

The couple reports that Lindsay will have it Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, every other Sunday, as well as Thanksgiving and Bachelor/Bachelorette season finales. Meanwhile Brandt will regularly care for it on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and every other Sunday, plus Super Bowls and if the Ravens ever make the playoffs.

“I can’t stand Lindsay anymore, but I couldn’t imagine my life without my Clikon Digital AirChef,” Gellner commented. 

“He wooed me during the early days of our relationship with scrumptious fried food. I thought he was a great cook–then I found out he was just putting everything in his air fryer. When that one wore out from extensive use, we purchased the Clikon Digital AirChef together. I’m very attached–I couldn't give it up. Although Brandt and I can’t be together, I am grateful that we could come to this resolution and that our Clikon Digital AirChef would not think our breakup was its fault.”

The Clikon Digital AirChef was contacted multiple times but did not respond.